Saturday, September 08, 2007

Grace and Retail Therapy

I really feel... like a total fool. I screwed up my trades for this week. I didn't follow through with my trading rules and instead of making a nice big pile of cash, I lost money. I'm just not with it. I really have bad presence of mind this week. The strange thing is that I've been through circumstances like this before and gotten thru with flying colors. But I'm not consistent. What the hell is wrong with me???

Perhaps I'm just not good at working under pressure. Maybe it was just my lack of sleep. Or the fact that I was worried about my past losses. Usually the stop loss/ profit targets would save me, but I didn't carry them out. Hmmm... OK, next time I will do that. I gotta be disciplined and stick to the plan.

So what did I do? I went and saw my physio - then on a whim, I walked into the Omega Store at Raffles City dressed in my shabby gym clothes. Had a look at some of the watches - and saw this one: the Omega Speedmaster. I liked it. It looks absolutely beautiful. And I bought it. Spur of the moment. I didn't intend to buy anything. But it looked SO COOL. Later on I found on the web internet sites which claim to sell the particular model for 15% less. But hey, at least I get peace of mind buying it at a genuine flagship Omega store.

WTH, do you know what? Its been a long time since I bought something special for myself. I kept on telling myself that I would get an Omega - but only after I had a nice big win on the stockmarket. Instead, I experienced a series of blunders and failures. Wiser yes, but my confidence is poorer.

I felt absolutely depressed this week. Absolutely. A real black dog.

But when I looked at the watch this afternoon. I thought to myself, "I'm blessed. Why feel so down? I'm a Child of God born by the Grace given to me by my Savior, Jesus Christ. Not by my works so that I may boast, but by grace." (In other words, my salvation is a gift from God)

And so to remind myself of this fact- I bought this watch. The Omega Speedmaster.

Each time I look at the watch - I know that I didn't do anything to earn or merit this beautiful object.

No comments: